Ponder this: How do you live with yourself when you feel guilty? What do you say to yourself when you are sad? Where do you take yourself when you feel lonely? What's your relationship with yourself like when you're glad?
The implicit message that I believe most of us receive is that somehow we're supposed to naturally and automatically befriend ourselves. We're supposed to naturally and automatically know ourselves inside out. We're supposed to naturally and automatically tend to ourselves through thick and thin. We're supposed to naturally and automatically love ourselves unconditionally. Right?
In a way, I definitely agree with this implicit message. It is in our nature to know ourselves, tend to ourselves, and love ourselves fully. But more often than not, that nature of ours is veiled by cultural norms, family traditions, and healthy defense mechanisms that are meant to shield us from the hard edges of life. (Read the rest here)
Though we're supposed to naturally and automatically be our own best friends, I (like many others) was so scarred by life that not only did I not want to be friends with myself but often (sadly) I was my own worst enemy.
Many of you know exactly what I am describing here, whether to a large or small extent. And to all of you out there, I want to say that there is a way out of this paradigm. But it's actually not a "going out"--it's a coming in.
Within you is the love you're always looking for. Within you is the comfort and ease. Within you is the great power of healing. Within you is boundless joy. Within you is true happiness and delight. Within you is bliss.
Most importantly, within you is your own self--your potential best friend and lifelong loving partner.
Are you interested in learning how to meet your emotions? Do you want to figure out how to deal with all your thoughts? Are you wishing to understand how to live in harmony with your own body? These are truly the elements of an everlasting friendship with yourself, and they are all available for you right here and right now.
How do you embark on or continue in a process of befriending yourself?
- Join me for the all-new Befriending Yourself: An Autumn Daylong Retreat to invite ease with the seasonal changes, increase the health of your respiratory system and elimination process, unlock inspiration, and de-regulate your brain and body from limiting patterns of thought, emotion, and sensation!
- Schedule a private meditation and/or acupressure session for us to tend together to the parts of you that need mending, (re)establish self-trust, and feel the support of your own self-friendship (available in person or over phone/web).
- Gather with a group of like-hearted women in the monthly meet-ups of True Friendship: A Women's Meditation Circle for sowing the seeds of true friendship and uncovering the great mysteries of living an awakened life!
Other resources that may support you in cultivating a path to your own equanimity amidst chaos are my recent blog on cultivating internal safety and/or iRest Yoga Nidra Meditations for immediate digital download.
May you always feel the loving support of your own friendship,
-- Shira Oz-Sinai
Share your thoughts, comments, and experiences below!